No half-sies

The gospel is not a sugar-coated, easy-to-take, fluffy type of story that brings butterflies to your heart every time you approach it. It’s like the song that goes, “ooooohhhhhhh sometiiiimes, I get a good feeling”. But wait…… sometimes I don’t get that feeling. Where’s that feeling today? How come it isn’t here?

The Story of the gospel brings hard truths to breathe in. It’s The Story that transforms the human heart. It is The Story that is undying and does not lie about the promises it speaks of.

I need to constantly pray for hope in what Jesus says will happen will actually happen. Constantly asking Jesus to give me the faith to believe in all of what he says, not just bits and pieces. Because half-believing is lukewarm faith, which just doesn’t cut it.

And I find myself here often.


Jesus says, “Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” Matthew 11:28-30.

This is where it gets real. Yeah, Jesus, it all sounds like a great idea! To learn from You who is gentle and humble in heart. Rest sounds pretty nice, too. And carrying around a light burden sounds peachy! Sign me up!

By definition, a yoke is ‘a wooden crosspiece that is fastened over the necks of two animals and attached to the plow or cart that they are to pull’. OK-unless you want your legs torn off from your body, I suggest you’re fully in the yoke.

NO HALF-SIES PEOPLE. No half-sies.

Jesus MEANS it when He says, “My grace is sufficient for you” 2 Corinthians 12:9.

Paul means it when he writes, “While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” Romans 5:8.

He means it when he writes, “the one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it” 1 Thessalonians 5:24.

AND STILL I QUESTION, “Why did he choose me? Why does he call me by name? I definitely am not deserving of it”.

During our work crew reunion at the Payne household in Gig Harbor, Washington, I was talking with my friend Janie in the basement. I was expressing this same thing in some way (probably a complicated twist of words and thoughts). She simply looks at me and says, “Ali, none of us are deserving. Jesus was the only one who deserved God’s righteousness. But that’s what the cross is all about. He died so that we may be right with our Father”. I will never forget this! To hear this said in such a refreshing light was what made it click in my head.

I still question these things today. I am fickle in my faith in what the Bible truly says. My heart is half-sies most of the time. I am a sinner who needs a Savior. But Jesus, somehow, pulls me into that yoke with Him. When I am half-sies, he keeps my legs protected from being chopped off. He reveals to me my unfaithfulness, which is hard to confront. Seeing the truth leaves me with a responsibility to do something about it. But there is no place I’d rather be than with Jesus, whose yoke is easy and whose burden is light.

He is consistent.

And just.

And good.

And THIS is the truth.

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